Dating domestic violence survivor
“If you believe, you will make better choices in whom you choose to date.” She says that by embracing the possibility of love, you’ll welcome it into your life.
Date Safe It is always important—not just for trauma survivors, either—to date safe. In some ways, it means letting your guard down slowly, instead of all at once.
Don’t feel bad about excusing yourself from the date if things start to feel uncomfortable or go too fast—ever.
A polite way to do this, unless you want to fake a bout of food poisoning, would be so say something like, “I don’t think I’m ready for this yet so I’m going to have to bow out.
But before you ever head out for that first coffee date, it’s important to make sure you have adequately dealt with the trauma you went through.
“A good [partner] will respect ‘no.’” Red Flags Avagliano goes on to point out some traits that unhealthy partners may exhibit.
As a survivor and as a human, I can only be the expert in my own experience.
But throughout my decade of dating, I picked up a few pointers when it comes to encountering a survivor of sexual violence on a date. If you have never encountered a sexual violence survivor, please, please educate yourself before going on any more dates.
It can seem inconceivable when you’re going through it, but after every breakup—even those from abusive partners—there will come a day when you feel that spark of attraction for someone again.
Everyone’s timeline is different and you should, in no way, rush yourself, but on the flip side you also shouldn’t discount the possibility that you deserve, and will find, happiness with someone.