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Online dating is the way to go—you just have to learn to work the system.” So take heart: Whether you’re a first-time player or a seasoned contestant who wants to up her game, our troubleshooting guide is here to help, with advice from both experts and survivors on how to search strategically, handle setbacks gracefully, maintain sanity, and enjoy the ride—with minimal agony and maximum ecstasy. Seven years ago, I signed up for Match.com, but I never took it seriously.For me, online dating is like exercise: At the end of the day, it’s easier to watch TV.But at 44, I started to realize that if I want a companion before Social Security kicks in, I have to leave the couch.I needed a trainer, someone who could help me focus—only instead of getting defined abs, I’d get a mate (hopefully, with defined abs).Her tip: “A little pre-date due diligence is smart.Do a Google image search with his photo to see if it links to a Facebook or Instagram account.” This can also protect you from scam artists—be wary if the photos seem too perfect or his language is considerably more fluent in his profile than in his messages. I’m spiritual and go to church, but “faith” sounds heavy.

And as for Tinder, sure, it can be used for swiftly finding a one-night stand, but there are If your life is too busy to squeeze in the time-consuming intricacies of a longer-term relationship, or you're just looking for a little low-stakes fun tonight, you need a quick, surefire way to find a quality fling.

Dance clubs and dive bars may have worked in the '90s, but now, even if you’re out, your phone is a much easier way to find someone to "watch Netflix and chill" with (especially someone you won’t regret tomorrow).

You may now see our list and photos of women who are in your area and meet your preferences.

One reason I’ve been passive about online dating: Most of the guys have been a little conservative for my taste.

(When you’re a black woman in your 40s, why do all your matches look like George Jefferson?

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